by Richard Flint Seminars
 |
How Did This Mess Happen? Carla approached me at the conclusion of my program with this little girl look on her face. She stood in front of me for a moment and then said with this sheepish grin on her face, “Okay, you said you could read us while you were speaking. So, what do you see in me?” I paused looked her squarely in the eyes and responded, “Are you really ready for this?” I think my response took her by surprise. The look on her face turned from a sheepish grin to a look of astonishment. She looked at me and said in a much quieter voice, “Yes, I really want to know what you see when you look at me.” “I see someone whose life is in a mess. The energy around your life is so scattered. I feel like you are running in so many different directions you don’t even know where you have been or where you are going. The reality is you are running away, but you keep running in a circle that just keeps pulling you deeper and deeper into an emotional pit.” Watching her face I knew I had hit her between the eyes and she wasn’t expecting that. I watched her eyes as she struggled to keep the tears from rolling down her cheeks, but it was to no avail. “How did you know that? I am great at hiding behind my mask. I can fake it to the point that most people think I am this happy go lucky person, but I am not. I am a mess. My life is out of control and I struggle each day just to get up and make it through my day. I don’t make it through most days.” The pause told me she was really working to compose herself. “I am at my wits end. Everywhere I turn there is more stuff for me to deal with. I have no safe haven in my life. I am really a mess!” Carla is not alone with living a life that is a mess. The majority of people spend their time creating a mess for their life and then, don’t know what to do to get out of it. The longer they stay in the mess the greater the feeling they will never get out of it. This takes us back to the major theme I have built the majority of my year writing about – each day you either feed your confusion or strengthen your clarity. The truth is — the choice a person makes determines whether confusion or clarity defines their life. Each, confusion or clarity, creates a pathway they have to travel. So, I want to pose two questions and then answer them.
There are four actions a human takes to mess-up their life. Action #1 First, they make bad decisions. The truth is they make dumb decisions. People will look at a situation, know it isn’t right for them and jump in with both feet. Why do they do that? The majority of the time their emotions are ruling their life. They know what they should do – that is their internal whisper talking to them, BUT rather than listen to their inner voice, they follow their emotions and the mess begins. Action #2 The second of the actions that makes one’s life a mess is the emotional entanglements they get into. Most people don’t confront the issues in their life; they avoid them. Everytime they avoid an issue, they bring and stack more emotions. The stacking of the emotions just entangles them to the point the person can’t see the pathway because of the emotional maze they have created. Action #3 The third action that makes one’s life a mess is the fact they stare at the mess, rather than work to clean it up. All of us are going to make a mess of our life at some point. That is just being human, BUT that doesn’t mean the mess has to continue. That is a choice. With that choice comes behaviors designed to support the choice. As long as they sit there and stare at the mess they have made, the mess they have created will just grow. Action # 4 The fourth action that makes one’s life a mess is the fact they stay the same. Sameness is a trap most people get caught in. They know what they need to do to improve their life; they will talk to others about what they need to do, BUT each day they walk out and repeat the mess they are in. They live in a world of good intentions designed to make them feel good for the moment. The challenge is — inside they know they are lying to self; they know their life is a series of words, not behaviors designed to improve who they are or where they are standing. Let’s say a person gets their life in a mess; I mean they are trapped in a world of sameness where everyday they wrestle with all the emotional garbage they have spent time creating. How do they redefine the process of feeding the confusion they have placed in their life. It is important a person understands, “They bring the confusion to their life.” Confusion is not a happening; it is a choice that is made and then implemented. How does that person turn their life around? Let me suggest four steps to unraveling a messy life. Step One: First, make asking the right question the starting point. Most of the messes people get their life into are because they race in with their emotions out of control and the mind is not a part of the decision they are making. I will guarantee if this is the process the result will be a mess that will take any life on a dangerous journey. To avoid this, one must stop before they make any decision, look at the situation and ask, “Will this feed my confusion or strengthen my clarity?” This first step is so simple and so powerful. I have people come to me and thank me just for this insight. I was at breakfast the other morning with one of my private coaching students who finally understood the power to this question. She looked at me and said with a smile on her face, “Your question works; I mean it really works. When you first told me to do this, I thought it was to simple to work. I have to tell you it is simple and it does work. That one question has helped me more than anything I have used in years.” The question, “Will this feed my confusion or strengthen my clarity” is designed to slow one down emotionally and allow their center of understanding (one’s brain) to become a vital part of what is happening. Step Two: The next step involves exiting if the pathway is leading to confusion. It is one thing for a person to understand the pathway and another to not go there. I can’t tell people the number of times I have had heard, “I knew the decision was wrong from the beginning, BUT there was just something inside me that wouldn’t let me go there.” The challenge here is a person’s emotional gathering. The more one gets sucked into a situation the more challenging it becomes to stop the emotional gathering that is going on. The more emotions one collects, the greater the challenge in stopping the path they are walking on. This makes asking the right question even more important. One has to be strong enough to pause in the midst of the emotional gathering, slow down and realize where they are headed. If one doesn’t the emotional damage that is done will bring them down even more. Step Three: Step three involves staying at a manageable pace. Can you see the process here? The greater the emotional gathering, the faster the emotional pace one is traveling. The faster one is moving emotionally the less they are willing to listen; when one stops listening, they close out any possibility for their mind to bring definition to what is happening. This makes their presence dangerous to self and others. Pace is so important to the management of life. What many fail to realize is pace controls the internal sight one is using. The wrong pace will feed one’s confusion; the wrong pace will blind a person to what is really happening in their life. One has to stay at a manageable pace. Step Four: The final step requires strengthening your life by reaching out to the right people. Everyone needs a support group, but not just people in their life that gives them opinions. Opinions become food for confusion. Opinions can’t offer clarity; they are simply words someone states that really can’t be validated. Accepting opinions just makes decision more perplexing. The right people won’t offer opinions; they will ask the right questions that will make one slow down and face what they are doing. One may not like what they are asking, but their presence in one’s life is to offer guidance, not words. This may sound harsh, but it must be understood. If one’s presence only offers confusion, they should be eliminated. Their presence is making a statement about their lack of concern. Their opinions shows they are not on a pathway of personal improvement. Keeping people in one’s life who are only there to continue confusion will result in the continual feeding of confusion, not the strengthening of clarity. Making a mess of one’s life is a choice, not a happening. Remember, each day a person is involved in either feeding their confusion or strengthening their clarity. Hey, which one are you best at right now? Don’t blame life for the mess; look in the mirror and realize it was your choice. If you would be interested in spending a weekend with me to gain a deeper sense of business or personal clarity, let me know. Email me at Richard@RichardFlint.com The Purpose of Leadership Is To Lead! What happens when the person in the leadership role always has to be right? Recently, I was invited into company to see if I could figure out why it had become an emotional mess. It didn’t take long to see what was going on. Here was a group of highly talented people who saw what was happening, with the knowledge to offer guidance working under a person who was never wrong. He would come to them, ask their thoughts and immediately find something wrong with what they were saying. How do you think the people felt? As one lady put it, “Why would I want to subject myself to this torture? He doesn’t care what I think; he is just looking for another way to make me look stupid and build his own ego. I have had enough of his game!” One of the other people put it this way. “I am so tired of his child like games. I have gotten to the point I don’t answer his questions. I just stand there and listen to him talk to his self. He is really destroying the morale of this place.” The purpose of leadership is to lead! That sounds so simple, but in too many places it doesn’t happen. Those who call themselves leaders are not; they are the author of so much of the confusion. What does it mean for the leader to guide the environment?
Remember, if leadership loses their presence with their people, they lose the power to lead. (I would love to hear your thoughts about this information. Email me at Richard@RichardFlint.com) Why Is Family So Important? Recently, I had the unique privilege of speaking for The Master’s Circle SuperConference in Orlando, Florida. This was a gathering of several thousand Chiropractors from all over the United States. One of the presentations I did was a luncheon for couples. If you know me, you know if you turn me lose and tell me, “Talk about anything you want to talk about,” I will immediately turn to the subject of family. I believe we have to get back to strengthening the family. The demise of the family is one of the major weakening points of our nation. It seems that the family is under constant attack today. On so many fronts people talk about the need to protect the family, but in another breath decisions are being made to weaken the foundation of family. Over the years, I have watched as the meaning of family has been redefined and the break up of the family easier to achieve. Family is one of the most important foundations of any person’s life. Without a strong foundation of family people are unprepared for the reality of life. Without a strong presence of family people lose one of the most valuable support groups. Without a strong love from family people are lost when it comes to understand the real meaning of relationships. Why is Family so important? Here are my thoughts:
(I would love to hear your thoughts about this information. Email me at Richard@RichardFlint.com) Strategies for Successful Selling Taking Care of The Customer Is Everyone’s Job! Hey, is sales a position that people are hired for or is it the responsibility of anyone and everyone who comes in contact with the customer? In too many situations we have limited the meaning of “Salesperson” to those few who are paid to sell, but isn’t that the responsibility of everyone who is part of the organization? In today’s business climate companies need to expand their definition of what it means to be a “salesperson.” Maybe, just maybe, the lack of this understanding has caused many companies to lose business because those who touch the life of the customer in any form don’t understand the importance of their role. Today, the wall between the “salesperson” and the rest of the people needs to come down; anyone and everyone who is in any visible or invisible form must understand their role as an ambassador for the company. Far too often those who stand in the background don’t get the praise they deserve; too many companies are too busy focusing on those who are out front to remember the importance of those who are behind the scenes. It has been said over and over again, taking care of the customer is not someone’s job; it is everyone’s job. While I am writing this I am staying at the Marriott at LaGuardia Airport in NYC. I stay here each month as I am visiting my private coaching people. Why do I stay here? I don’t have to; there are at least ten other hotels in the immediate area. I stay here because of the people. There is Eddie who most would see as a bellman; I don’t; I see him as one of their best salespeople. On several occasions he has gone out of his way to take care of something for me. Do I appreciate that? You bet! There is the front desk staff who call me by name; do I appreciate that? You bet! It makes me feel good. I have watched them with other people who are checking in and they are great at making them feel special. I watch the faces of people and the smiles they present as they are checking in. Are the front desk people part of the salesforce? You bet! There is the house cleaning staff; I know when I open the door to my room, I know it is going to be clean and ready for me. I can count on that. Are these people part of the Marriott salesforce? You bet! All of these people together create the sales partnership that creates the presence the Marriott LaGuardia has with their customers. Many of these partners may have never been seen, but their presence is felt. Hey, taking care of the customer is not someone’s responsibility; it is everyone’s responsibility. (I would love to hear your thoughts about this information. Email me at Richard@RichardFlint.com) Richard, Just a short note to thank you for your great presentation last Thursday at Respectfully, Bill Mann Richard's New Book Is Now Available!
Is that simply a statement or is it truth?
The contradiction between what a person says and what they do forms the foundation to most of the human confusion a person experiences. When spoken words and acted out behavior are not in sync, one will feel confusion, frustration and disappointment. Inside the pages of Behavior Never Lies the reader will explore the eight steps to balancing words and behavior.
With these eight steps as a guide, the reader will be prepared to live a life where they are free to reach a place where confusion and contradiction no longer define who they are. They will completely understand the thought — all behavior has an agenda. They will clearly grasp the idea — all human lives collide at the point of agendas. Agendas are not defined by words, but by behavior. When one finishes reading Behavior Never Lies, they will lean back, pause and say, “Now I understand!” Order Before November 30th and get 20% Off! CLICK HERE! Richard's StarMaker 2007 Conference How important is Motivation? Is motivation a moment of energy or the enthusiasm that goes with living a life with direction and purpose? What happens to a life that lacks motivation? These are just a few of the questions that will be addressed at StarMaker 2007. The theme Richard has chosen is Feeding The Hunger of Motivation. In Richard's words, “One of the most confusing teachings that has come down through the ages are the words used to explain the concept of motivation. It is concept because it lacks the consistent persistency necessary to maintain the momentum of energy. When motivation is a moment of energy, it is not motivation; it is being psyched. That one thought makes motivation impossible to maintain.” This is going to be one powerful StarMaker. Mark the dates on your calendar – July 20-22 at Marriott’s Doral Spa and Golf Resort in Miami, Florida. Keep watching for more information of making this one of your 2007 Growth Experiences. Click Here to Download The Conference Brochure!
The Next Generation of Programs by Richard Flint Creating A Presence of Value What are people willing to pay for? Will they pay for a product they need? Yes, but can one pay for a product they need and be disappointed with the experience they have had? YES! One of the connections that seems to have been placed on the back burner for most companies is the fact creating an experience of value is more important than selling a product. Would you agree with that statement? Value has become another one of those terms that has lost the real power of its meaning. Reality is, you either create customers for life or customers of moments. If the only thing happening is customers for moments, you are designing a self-destructive environment. In this program Richard will examine:
The central question Richard addresses is: What Are The Rewards To Creating An Experience of Value?
Can you see the value of this program for your people? As much as we may preach customer care, the reality is most don’t see the importance of Creating A Presence Of Value. Call Hilda today at 1-800-368-8255 or (757) 873-7722 for more information, or email her at Hilda@RichardFlint.com. Together let’s strengthen your presence with your customers so you have a presence that is present when you are not present.
To schedule Richard for your next meeting or conference, please call Hilda at 1-800-368-8255, or email Hilda@richardflint.com. Be sure visit Richard's website for more program information!
Find out how to help other people have a better quality of life and make some extra cash at the same time. Richard’s Affiliate Program is an opportunity to build a partnership with Richard and help him reach those who need his information and insights. You know the power of his message and now you can help others know it too.
Richard Flint Seminars 11835 Canon Blvd., Suite C-105 Newport News, VA 23606 1-800-368-8255 or (757) 873-7722 Fax 1-800-232-8255 o (757) 873-7772 Questions? Call Denise at 1-800-368-8255 or email: MindJogger@richardflint.com Newsletter Date: November 16, 2006 |
||||||||||||||||||||||
|
