I watched people change jobs only to take the same attitude into their next place of employment. They may have changed scenery, but they are still the same person they were at the last place. If change doesn’t create improvement, it is just a redefinition of sameness.
If I spent a day in YOUR life, would I find any areas where YOU need to improve? If we sat and talked about it, would YOU agree with me mentally that YOU need to change, but emotionally have an internal fight? The majority of people want to change as long as THEY don’t have to change anything to achieve it.
It is so easy to get trapped in a life of routine. I am writing a new book entitled, I Need A Life!, and it is about the two different styles of life. YOU either Last In Frustrating Existence or Live In Fulfilling Environments! As far as I can see, those are your only two choices. Reality is YOU do choose one of those for YOUR life.
You either fight change and stay in sameness or you accept change and move toward improvement. If you can think of any other choice, let me know. I can’t see it.
If a person knows they need to improve their life, why would they fight the agent of improvement – change? Here are the basic reasons I have found.
Change challenges your routine! To bring improvement into your life, you have to challenge the routines you have placed in your life as walls you hide behind. So many times I have had conversations with people who were stuck, understood the need to “take that wall down,” but chose to stay behind it, yet talk about what they needed to do. Routine that denies your life improvement is a trap that causes them to last in frustrating existence.
Change holds you accountable! Accountability – what a nasty word! It means you have to be responsible for your behavior, responsible for the decisions you make, responsible for what you have chosen to do with your life. That means others aren’t the reason; they are the escape path. They may plead ignorance, but they know what they are doing. To admit that makes them accountable for their behavior. They have chosen to Last In Frustrating Existence, rather than Live In Fulfilling Environments.
Change addresses your excuses. Change takes the emphasis off of “why” and “how” and places it on “What Are You Going To Do?” That is not a question resistant people want to deal with. They would rather last in their world of excuses, blame and reasons, than have to face their chosen design for the life they have chosen. Lasting is more acceptable to them than Living.
Change notices the right in your life! Have you ever talked to a person who said they wanted to improve, but yet used all the bad things in life to justify why their life is the way it is? They don’t want to see the good; they only want to see the bad. By doing that they have their reasons why their existence is such a mess.
I’ve heard it stated this way – “I guess this is just the way my life was meant to be,” or “If it is meant to be, it will be!” Both of these are just excuses. Life is whatever you design it to be. You can argue with that all you want, but it is a fact! You get to choose existence or fulfillment.
People fight change because it gets you moving in a different direction. How powerful is the fear of the unknown? How challenging is it to step into the unknown if you don’t have a plan to implement improvement? This is a huge challenge. When you are stuck in a routine and over a period have shut your imagination down, the fear of breaking out of the trap of routine existence can be overwhelming. As much as you want to improve, the fear has you paralyzed. As much as you want to Live In Fulfilling Environments the fear keeps you chained to Lasting In Frustrating Existence.
People resist change because it expects improvement! For years I have said, “If what you say you want is contradicted by what you do, you are lying to yourself and all those you have said it to.” Is that truth? Improvement is not what you talk about doing; it is what you do through facing and improving your behavior. Talking about what YOU are going to do and never doing it, is simply a lie.
The interesting fact is change will happen! You can fight it and Last In Frustrating Existence or YOU can accept change, implement improvement and Live In Fulfilling Environments. You will choose and in that choice you will define and design your life.
Email me your thoughts to Richard@richardflint.com
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